Don't Know Where I Am....

It's been a bit since my last post, there has been a lot on my mind lately. We did manage to scrape through the heavy rains with out too much damage, we got about 4 inches of water in the basement. Luckily we put the new washer and dryer on bricks so they didn't get wet, the sump pump just couldn't keep up with all that water coming in.
The company Darlene works for, Community Health Care, had their Christmas party on January 10, yeah it's late, who cares? The employees and their families were treated to dinner at the Ram in Puyallup, nice digs, good food. Darlene talked me into donating a show as a treat for her coworkers. I have always been leary show donation thing, it has been my experience that most people do not appreciate something unless there is a value on it. The crowd was DEAD, and I KNOW I hit all the effects perfect!!!!! There is an effect I do where I make a prediction before anyone arrives and place it under the center piece of a table. The group comes in and I start the show, I write 1,2,3,4 on a sheet of paper and ask some one in the audience to circle a number. He circles #3, I ask him to name a vegetable, he calls out carrot. I ask someone to open the paper under the center piece and read what's on the paper, 3 and carrot. NO !@#@# reaction!!!!!!!! No more donation shows, no money, no magic!!!!
I am beside myself right now, times are hard, money is tight, VERY tight. Darlene told me the other day that because feed prices are so high, that all the farm animals must go. This is giving me some bad flashbacks. My first wife, Cathy had a lot of cats and dogs, and I mean a lot!!! Well to make a long story short, the Humane Society found out and she had to put most of them down. When they went, she sent me on my merry way, as she didn't need my help anymore with the pets. I don't want this to happen again, I can't handle missing another child grow up. I am depressed, I made an appointment with my doctor to up my meds, maybe that will help.